This last week, I've been flying on auto-pilot. I don't know where my head's been. Off in the clouds somewhere. I dunno. It's been rubbish. Anyway, a couple of days ago, I started craving biscuits. You know, those old Arnott's assorted creams? The kind you'd get when you visited certain rellies when you were a kid?
Now, I don't usually buy junk food. In fact, I don't think I ever buy junk food. Nor do I ever usually want to.
So I ignored it.
But the cravings got worse and worse, and today, I went to the shops and bought 2 packets of biscuits and 2 bottles of milk. It should've raised alarm bells that I was buying 2 packets of biscuits. TWO BIG FAMILY-SIZED PACKETS. Cravings or not, there's no reason that I should've ever been buying that many biscuits for myself. But I really, REALLY wanted them.
Then I came home and gorged myself on biscuits and milk until I was sick.
Wow, it certainly snapped me out of the daze I was in. But it still leaves me with a few unanswered questions:
- What the fuck just happened?
- Do I need to worry about it happening again?
- Should I throw out the biscuits that are left over?
5 comments :
Interesting. Wonder if it's something to do with hormones or nutrition balance. Also, is this something you've done in the past? Ie binged on something like that until the point of being sick? If so, then it might be a sign of returned behaviour.
The first question is to do with something physical, and the second to do with something emotional or psychological. If you *have* done this sort of thing in the past, then I'd be thinking about how things are you for emotionally etc. What are the stresses. You've said in the past your parents are getting older and the responsibility for their care might fall to you.
So, I think only you can know why this happened. Should you be worried? Better biscuits and milk than some other substances I can think of. Also should you throw what's left away? It's good to know there IS some left, so that's something you can think about as well. You didn't eat it all and even if you did, it really probably isn't significant. But yeah, if it's something you don't do usually, and you got that craving, then it's something to be curious about. Why it happened etc. But yeah, I'd get rid of it, unless you have some nieces etc happening by soon?
Also, is this something you've done in the past? Ie binged on something like that until the point of being sick?
Yes. With alcohol. But I don't know if those things are related. When I was fat, I'd sometimes binge eat, but I don't remember doing it until I puked.
Having read your comment and thought about it, the only new stress I can think off is the shit I've been getting off my family recently for being too thin. Ugh, It'd be fucking wretched if that's what this was all about.
Thanks for the input, Melba.
Maybe I can pawn the remaining bickies off onto lil'cuz. She's a yo-yo dieter though, so it'll depend on whether she's in an up or down tick.
This evening, my belly has swollen up like I'm eight months pregnant. Gas, I guess. From biscuits and milk? Very strange.
Yes I'm sure. I believe you do detox and your body gets used to healthy stuff, then reacts when you eat it. I've found similarly with wheat. I don't know how much wheat you eat but there's wheat in them biscuits. Or certainly the milk, dairy might make you bloat if you don't usually have it.
I don't eat any wheat. These days, when I go shopping, I go to the vege section; the butter, cheese, and egg sections; the tea isle; and then the butchers.
I've decided to go the high-fat, no-carbs route. Am considering adding coconut oil to the mix. I hear others speaking highly of it, and it might be a nice change to putting butter in everything.
I know it seems obvious that my biscuit craving was all about the lack of carbs, but I've been off them for quite some time now, years I think, and never had an experience like this before.
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